Beware! Warning! Caution!

Apparently there is a new video game coming out that adults are a bit worried about. They believe it will influence our children in a negative way. Maybe even cause the next school shooting - or maybe a church shooting...

Here's the description:

Yesterday, on T2A, we were introduced to The Purpose Driven Life Takers. An ultra-violent video game, Left Behind: Eternal Forces, based on scenes from the first four novels in the Left Behind novel series, puts you "on a mission - both a religious mission and a military mission -- to convert or kill Catholics, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, gays, and anyone who advocates the separation of church and state". It's to be rated T for Teens, meaning it is targeted at the 13-19 year old age group, and is "slated for release by October 2006 in advance of the Christmas shopping rush".

Doesn't that sound great??? I wanna play!


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Long time, No blog

Hello folks!

I have a lot of ground to cover to keep this updated. I am going to do a very quick re-cap.

My in-laws came down from MN at the end of April. That meant no blogging due to cleaning, organizing, etc. Me going into a frenzy. They stayed for about a week, and took my daughter with them when they left (for two whole weeks!! Woo hoo!!). To my surprise, I missed her immediately. Dammit!

Once they left, we had to start preparations for our annual May festival. I tried to cram 2 weeks worth of sewing into one week. I did not succeed, but still did better than I thought I would. All in all, a good sewing phase. (No blogging then either.)

Then, we were at the annual May festival for about a week. We were staff this time around. That was different!! I'd do it again though.

We picked up our daughter on May 15th from Nashville. Quite a long drive, but plane tickets are cheaper in and out of Nashville. It was great to see our Diva again!!!

Since then, I have been trying to get back in the groove of things. My computer has been screwing with me. I wonder if the modem is starting to go... Basically, I get online and do a fraction of what I planned before I have to restart. By then, I just don't wanna try again. I put the Sims in instead. We have the expansion packs for them now. We get to date, go shopping, go on vacation... It's fantastic!! I turned my bachelor (Stud Wannabe) into a player. Women actually got into a fight over him. Also he was told that he "knew just what to do to leave her wanting more." *laugh* Maybe I can work on my penis envy issues through him. I love it: Therapy via The Sims.

I love all of you, and I am missing the blogosphere. I'll get there, I promise!

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And now for something completely different...

I did something amazing today. I haven't done this in a very very long time.

I bought a bra today.

Yes, that's right folks. You heard me correctly. A bra.

I haven't worn one in years. I haven't even owned one in years. I guess I got rid of all my old ones. I don't have an actual memory of doing it, but since I don't have any...

I also remembered why I hate them. The band that goes around the body is uncomfortable. (That's right - I didn't quit wearing them as a hippie statement; I stopped cuz they sucked to wear, especially when it's hot outside.)

One good thing - it lifts and separates! Very weird to see at first. I felt like I had weapons coming out of my body. I even tried attacking my husband with my torpedoes. I got over that pretty fast.

Actually, I bought two bras today, but one was hella bad. It was one of those made my shirt pointy like a Madonna video at best, and cut my breasts in half at worst. It made me look like I had two fat rolls on top of each other instead of lovely lady lumps (or does that refer to the ass?? I was never sure.). Sounds yummy, doesn't it? Hence, the purchase of the second bra.

Do you have any idea how difficult it is to buy a bra w/o trying it on, and not knowing what size to get???

Welcome to my world.

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I just don't see it...

Which Princess Bride Character are You?
this quiz was made by mysti

(With the answers I gave for the quiz, I thought I was going to be Vizzini.)

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Science never lies.

A study conducted by Stanford's Department of Psychiatry has revealed
that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ
depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.

For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged
and masculine features.

However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to prefer a
man with scissors lodged in his temple and a bat jammed up his ass
while he is on fire. Further studies in this area have been canceled.

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No idea what this means, but what the hell

My blogger code:

B6 d- t k+ s u-- f i+ o++ x+ e- l c

Edit: Here's the decoder.


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Off the radar

I have been MIA since last Friday or so. That's when we got satellite with a dvr - for both TVs. Then to add to the "new toy" fun time, we also had a free Showtime weekend. I have so many movies recorded... :D

Also, on G4 (it's a channel), they have the best show ever ever ever. "Happy Tree Friends and Friends". That's right folks, you heard me. The and friends part? Oh, Joe Cartoon, Retarded Animal Babies, plus others. I have it set to record every week. Hell yeah!

I love the Search option satellite gives you. We've had satellite before, and I've missed it. There were so many shows I had to give up when we moved here. I love "What Not to Wear", but cable didn't have TLC. I do now, baby!!!

So, as you can see, I have been learning everything there is to learn about my new toy. It's been a week. I think I can take a break now.

Well, now that's not true. I have not been sitting on the couch for a week.

Little Diva wanted an email address. I kept telling her I would find her one on one of the kid-safe sites. After two days, I couldn't find anything. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zip a roonie. I searched the web for an email that wouldn't allow porn in, and there aren't any??? Give me a freakin' break.

One cool thing that I found, and downloaded, was a kid's browser. It blocks the entire internet with the exception of approved sites (like Crayola, Disney, PBS, etc...) That means I can feel happy as a clam (What a stupid expression. As if clams are happy.) that she can sit down and surf as much as she wants, and not run into any creeps. I recommend it for all parents. It's called KidRocket.

Now why can't they have safe email addresses too?????

I have tried to blog several times this week, but I end up getting busy with other stuff, and run out of time. That sucks.

This weekend will be a busy one for us. It's the last full weekend to get shit done before my in-laws arrive on the 23rd. We have to make it look like we actually care, ya know. Okay, mostly it is rearranging, finish unpacking, organizing, and making everything look roomy and spacious. In a word, perfection. It's not like I'm expecting too much, right? Right?

The dogs will have to go to the groomers for a wash, we have to get Diva's b-day party nailed down, get her a plane ticket back home, buy blank CDs, get Diva some gifts, stock the house with food before the 23rd, I have to sew some stuff before May 11th, we have to make sure we have enough money for the dog sitter, etc, etc, etc... Very busy around here. As the dates get closer, you can watch my stress levels rise. Won't that be fun??

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Stupid pills 1, Me 0

My "I've been taking stupid pills" condition is getting worse. Now, not only have I forgotten how to speak correctly, but it turns out I can't spell for shit either.

I have misspelled words I KNOW how to spell forwards and backwards. And, dammit, I'm doing the same words over and over.

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*avid devotion*

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

My god finally has A Good Book!!!

The Gospel of the
Flying Spaghetti Monster

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Tweaking

I found out that all email posts will have to have their font color changed. Or maybe I'll leave it so I can keep track of which ones were emails... Hmmm..

Opinions?

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Testing, testing 1, 2

I am trying out a much easier way to post. I am so behind the times!! (That should be my mantra...)
Anyway, I can email to my blog!! I'm sure most of you are already doing this, but just in case you aren't:
If you are using Blogger, got to Settings. Once there, there are all kinds of wonderful little buttons to click at the top of the page. You are looking for the one that says Email. Pick an address, and voila! post from your email.

How cool is that?

(Edit: It sent it to my drafts. What good is that?????)

I'm so damn cool!

My blog is worth $5,645.40.
How much is your blog worth?

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I'm back from MN.

For all of you wondering, I am doing just fine.

People are born, and people die. It's what happens in-between that matters. My mom had a fantastic in-between. She was loved by many.

None of us kids will ever be able to measure up to her life. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I enjoy my seclusion. It's not important for me to have get-togethers like it was for my mom. She worked very hard at being the perfect hostess to the known and unknown alike.

I actually feel like me again. I missed me. I never realized how much I like me until I wasn't around for awhile. (I hope that made sense without sounding narcissistic.)

I feel motivated to live again. My headaches have almost disappeared. I'm still getting them more frequently that I ever used to, but I can deal with it. It's not a daily thing anymore. My kid isn't asking me to stop having them anymore.

Now I have the normal stress of getting the house ready before my in-laws come down. Deadline is April 23rd. Trust me, that's not enough time without killing myself, but I'll get it done. Probably drive my family crazy in the process, but they'll just have to make the sacrifice dammit. :D

I may actually feel like socializing soon. I know I'm answering a few more emails, and I actually made a phone call tonight to one of my best buds. I haven't talked to him in like forever. Damn dolphins!

I saw a few more of my friends tonight - not cuz I was visiting, but cuz I was dropping my kid off. I realized how much I missed all of them. Especially this one dude that can read my mind like it was a comic book laying open on the floor.

I may even be in the mood for sex. You have no idea how rare that has been the past few months. Everything I was going through sucked all desire outta me. A few times I kinda felt like it, other times I was convinced it might help me relax... I don't think there was one time that I was really into it - from conception to action, that is. Well, maybe once. (Just in case I've forgotten something.)

I am feeling a huge sense of relief, and that has helped me feel good. Feeling good is always preferable.

I will say I am grieving in the strangest way ever. It almost feels like I'm not grieving. Weird, eh? I just keep surprising myself. :D

Okay folks, over and out!

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Travel rant

Okay, so here's the deal: Originally, Me, Little Diva, stepsister, her baby, and my stepfather were supposed to drive up to MN Friday night/Saturday morning. They decided to fly him up instead, and it was going to be me and my stepsister driving up Saturday morning (which I was thrilled about - no stepfather!! woot!) . I still wanted to leave Friday night, but she wasn't budging. So I compromised. Yesterday, I call and leave her a message letting her know my husband would be unable to drive all the way to Clarksville (almost 300 miles from here) just to drop me off, since he had to work on Saturday. She calls me back last night, and tells me she was going to call me tonight (Thursday) to let me know "our" plans had changed. (Think she could have called before then???) "Our" plans now were we had to wait until Monday or Tuesday to leave, cuz they found an apartment and she had to be there when their stuff got delivered cuz her husband had to work (but no understanding for my husband???). That means I wouldn't get to MN until Wed probably. I had already made plans for Sun., Mon., and Tues., and now I would have to rearrange them (or cancel them).
I get that she has to be there, and that they had to find an apt. and all that. Didn't stop me from being pissed though.
And the kicker?? She wasn't willing to meet us partway so we could be dropped off. The halfway point is Cookeville - even then my husband would have to make a 5 hour round trip. She wasn't even willing to meet in Nashville (which is beyond the halfway point - ya know, closer to her). She's been driving so much lately that the thought of it just exhausted her, plus anywhere that we could meet would be in the opposite direction of MN. She basically wanted my husband to make a 10 hour round trip. HELL NO.
I was so pissed last night. I was sitting with my arms crossed trying to hold it in. I was looking around in my immediate vicinity to see if there was anything I could throw or break. Hours later, we are walking the dogs, and then we go back outside for my last cig of the night. Since I was still pissed, and it had been hours of being pissed, I decided to smoke some happy green to see if that would mellow me out some (normally I look down on people who use things to change their mood, but last night? fuck it.). IT DIDN'T. Think about that. I got altered, and I was still pissed. That should give you some idea of how I felt.

(Edit: This was as far as I got, and then it was saved to draft. I decided to leave it as-is. In case you're curious, however, Diva and I took the Greyhound up to MN.)


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Superman's knife - if he had one

I got sucked into an infomercial today. I slept on the couch last night, so, in my defense, I was still in my waking up process.

Anyway, it was the coolest frickin' knife ever!!! It was sonic something or other. This thing sliced through everything w/o anything getting squished. No, seriously, nothing got squished. They even cut a slice of bread into two pieces. Now before you roll your eyes and tell me you do that every time you have a sandwich, that's not what I mean. They sliced it the long way. You ended up having two thinner slices of bread (the selling point was cutting down on carbs if anyone cares about that). Try cutting a slice of bread with your favorite, sharpest knife. See if it squishes. See if it is even possible.

There are different blades for this thing, including a craft blade. It cut a frozen pizza in half! Now the cool thing about all of this, is you aren't sawing back and forth. You just glide this knife right through. The sonic-whatever slices for you. Think about that: gliding through a frozen pizza. Wow, huh?

You recharge it, and it's cordless - perfect for outdoor use!

So, has anyone seen this knife or, better yet, used it? I would love to hear opinions.

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The Ultimate Showdown

I found this on the blogger's forum, blogpretty.com.
You have to check it out. I was jammin' to it, and I now want to download the tune - if I can find it.


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This is perfect for me!

~J~ [noun]: A real life muppet 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

(When I put in my real name, it was an adjective meaning banshee-like. :D)


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Blogpretty

Do you remember the first days of blogging? Not ever, but personally. I do. I was finally convinced to get myself a blog by a blog pimp (:D), and it was fantastic. I could log on and puke all over my keyboard, and then publish it. Fantastic!
As I started exploring the blogosphere, I started to notice other things. You could do more than type and publish with a blog? You could put a link in your post without having to show the url? What are all these nifty things on the sidebar???

I had to ask people I trusted to give me the how-to on these new-fangled things. I only bugged them about the really important stuff. Ya know, they were working or something. There's no way they could have kept up with my thirst for knowledge without getting annoyed.

Now, if there had been one of these, I wouldn't have been in danger of annoying anyone. I could have soaked up as much knowledge as I wanted, on my own time.

So there it is. A shameless plug. Go, check it out, register, get some questions answered - or learn something completely new and different!

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Random Quote from my sidebar

Question: Is it better to abide by the rules until they're changed or help speed the change by breaking them?

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Email joke

An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat tight so that it would not blow away in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said, "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?"

"Yes, I know," said the lady. "I need both my hands to hold onto this hat."

"But madam, you must know that you are not wearing any panties, and your privates are exposed!", said the gentleman in earnest.

The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"

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