More dumbasses I have not had the pleasure of kicking in the balls

I just watched Ku Klux Klan: A Secret History on A&E.
I was so ignorant. Sure I knew there have been crazy hooded racists for a long time. Yes, I knew they targeted black people, and had a reign of terror. I've never understood the mindset of these people.

Did you know that the founders did not set out to be violent dumbasses? Nope, it was six college age dudes (not in college) that decided to form a club or a fraternity. They made up silly names for the officers and initiates. They further decided on weird costumes and secret identities. They would ride through the little Tennessee town in these costumes, and, of course, all kinds of men wanted to be part of this new club. After they had been riding through the night, claiming to be ghosts, trying to frighten newly freed slaves, they thought they could get away with a bit more.

Did you know the Klan was wiped out? Yep, Federal government kept cracking down on these SOBs until no one wanted to be a member.

Of course there was a revival. Sixteen guys got together and decided to get it going again. By then, however, they discovered hatred for black people wasn't enough to bolster membership. They added Catholics and Jews. They spun it to seem a patriotic thing to join. Since there was a lot of dissatisfaction in America in the 1920's, people were eager to sign up.

Every time the Klan was revived, violent acts increased. I know, duh. What was amazing to me was that it took until 1977 (see Edit) for anyone to get convicted, and then it was a 15 year old crime. This creep finally got convicted for bombing a church in Birmingham which killed four girls.

The trials for all Klan crimes (that actually made it to a jury) had all white male juries.

I've decided Bill Baxley is one of my heroes. He was a law student when the girls were killed, and he vowed to someday do something about it. When he became Attorney General, he reopened the case. That's not what elevated him to hero status though. He received a threatening letter from the Klan, and his reply was,
"My response to your letter of February 19, 1976 is - kiss my ass.
Sincerely,
Bill Baxley
Attorney General"

How cool is that? A politician formally responding like that is fantastic. Not only is he swearing, and speaking like you or I would, but he's in effect saying, "yeah, whatever, you puny dumbasses". Gotta love the balls of that man.

By this time, the Klan had lost a great deal of it's numbers. They searched for new issues to have hissy fits about. They found affirmative action, reverse discrimination, and forced busing. It didn't do them much good. They would hold their little protests, but they were met with angry and violent citizens. They no longer held the public sway. They needed to do something.

Enter David Duke. He didn't wear robes or slur the black people. He talked to the press, and boy could he spin. "We're not anti-black, just pro-white." He also mentioned that there were thousands of organizations working for the interests of blacks and other minorities, and they were just working for the interests and culture and ideals of the white people. He almost made the Klan seem warm and fuzzy. That would explain the surge of new members... again.

Luckily, The Southern Poverty Law Center created Klan Watch. It doesn't seem like much, but there was a fantastic result... after a tragedy.

In March 1981, several klansmen wigged the fuck out when a trial of a black man accused of killing a white cop resulted in a mistrial. One of the higher ups (A&E described him as a titan) said that if a black man could get away with murdering a white man, then we should be able to kill a black man. (I had to blink at this. Hadn't they already killed a whole bunch of black people over the years? One white cop gets killed, and this means hunting season is open??? Whatever.) Two klansmen, 17 and 26, decided to go hunting that night. They found, kidnapped, killed, and hung a man up in Mobile for everyone to see. A good ol' fashioned lynching.

These two crackheads went to trial. I totally expected them to be set free. It had happened so many times before, right? Well, not this time!!! One of them confessed, and they were both convicted of murder. Not manslaughter or some other pussy charge, but murder. It didn't end there. The mother of the lynched man filed a civil lawsuit against the United Klans of America. The trial only lasted four days, and the jury only deliberated for four hours. The verdict? Seven million dollars against the UKA. It destroyed them. All they really had was a 7000 sq ft. national headquarters building, and 10 acres of land. The mother of the murdered black man now had the deed handed to her by a southern jury. Yee haw!! That's fantastic!
(See, I told you Klan Watch was a good thing.)

Klansman finally realized that pursuing terror might cause them to lose their money, home, or life. The violent acts became sporadic.

In 1997 , one of the killers of the black man mentioned above was executed. He was the first klansman to be killed for a klan act. Raise your glasses and toast!

Their members at one time exceeded 3 million, but have dwindled to around 5,000 in the present day.

I know I may seem overly excited when the scales are still unbalanced, but I welcome change - especially change for the better. I feel like we sane people have been at war with the crazies forever, and we are finally gaining ground, morale is lifted, and hope is restored. I can only imagine what it was like in the 1950's when the Klan had free reign. My heart literally seizes up in fear imagining life back then. I am so proud of the people that took a stand - even when it meant their life was in danger.

I think it is our responsibility as the sane ones to teach our children to be sane. The Klan members fill their little ones' heads full of worthless crap, and we need to fight back by filling our children's' heads with the truth. What is the truth? Racism is some crazy ass idea that has no business remaining in our modern day. Also, we should teach our children not to enable racists. If you see one, call him out, and don't associate with him anymore. Period.

How's that for a soapbox history lesson?
*stepping down*

***Edit: Sorry. The first klansmen to go to jail was in 1965. Three of them were sentenced to 10 years each for violating the civil rights of others. In '67, 18 klansmen went to trial, and their Imperial Wizard along with 6 others, were found guilty. Wizard dude got the maximum sentence of 10 years. Go FBI!!!
In 1967, a report was released saying The Klan was un-American, which was a previous selling point.

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No idea who wrote this, but it's soooo true.

"My mother was a fanatic about public restrooms. When I was a little girl, she'd take me into the stall, show me how to wad up toilet paper and wipe the seat. Then she'd carefully lay strips of toilet paper to cover the seat. Finally, she'd instruct, "Never, NEVER sit on a public toilet seat. Then she'd demonstrate "The Stance," which consisted of balancing over the toilet in a sitting position without
actually letting any of your flesh make contact with the toilet seat.

That was a long time ago. Now, in my "mature" years, "The Stance" is
excruciatingly difficult to maintain.

When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is occupied.

Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter.

The dispenser for the modern "seat covers" (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there were one, but there isn't - so you carefully but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants, and assume "The Stance."

In this position your aging, toneless thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold "The Stance."

To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, "Honey, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!" Your thighs shake more.

You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your purse. That would have to do. You crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It is still smaller than your thumbnail.

Someone pushes open your stall door because the latch doesn't work. The door hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest, and you and your purse topple backward against the tank of the toilet. "Occupied!" you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose your footing altogether, and slide down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course.

You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try.

You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because, you're certain, her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, "You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get."

By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a firehose that somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too. At that point, you give up.

You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a gum wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks. You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women, still waiting. You are no longer able to smile
politely to them.

A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. ( Where was that when you NEEDED it??) You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it the woman's hand and tell her warmly, "Here, you just might need this."

As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used and left the men's restroom. Annoyed, he asks, "What took you so long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?"

. . .This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public restroom (rest??? you've got to be kidding!!). It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers their other commonly asked question about why women go to the restroom in pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse and hand you Kleenex under the door."

~Do not expand~