I am in a pissy mood today.
Last night Bitch calls and leaves an accusing message (and she would like us to call her back but she's heading to Cub Scouts).
Husband called and left a corrective ('Bitch get this straight!' with much nicer phrasing) message.
Later on, Dad from next door knocks on our door. I assume it is Bitch, so I wondered how long she would knock before going away. Well, it wasn't her, and HE didn't go away.
We had a nice talk, and I should win a fucking Oscar acting like his kid was a normal everyday kid -- instead of the bully he really is.
We agreed all the kids just need to stop talking about it. And I'm not going into what IT is.
On the upside, Next Door Dad was at the same Cub Scouts meeting Bitch was, but he didn't listen to a word she said. So he didn't find out until they got home from the meeting about what went down that day. I love that he didn't HEAR her at all. It's a mutual hatred, and he doesn't think I should control my 'gonna lose all control and punch Bitch right in that ugly face of hers' urges. He understands those feelings.
So I had to talk with my kid this morning and tell her IF she was the one that was starting it (Not that I'm saying you are lying), she has to stop (Not that I'm saying you are doing anything wrong). I explained the ND Dad was telling his boys the same thing.
Basically, what it felt like was me telling my kid 'I don't believe you, you're lying, you can't come to me because I'm obviously not here for you, I don't support you, You Are On Your Own'. I hated that. HATED IT.
True, I don't see what happens on the bus or at school, but at what point does the line get drawn in the sand?
Am I supposed to tell her to keep it to herself if these boys are bullying her because there will be major fallout in our neighborhood? Three kids all telling different versions of the same story -- What am I supposed to do?
I try telling her to stick up for herself, ignore it.. I've given her good comeback lines, and had her practice timely bitchy stuck-up attitude to use when he is trying to get her to react. I also told her that if she does all these things, and it still doesn't stop (meaning he found a new victim), tell an adult (teacher, bus driver, etc.).
Apparently, I can't tell her that anymore. We went to her conference, had a good discussion, established new guidelines, and we all tried to gain more understanding.
Walking out of the conference, I mentioned what Next Door Bully was still doing (principal took care of it the first time) as another possible element that has added to her recent angst/stress/pressure.
Keyword: Mentioned. Not had a conference about. I did not ask for the Gestapo to be brought in. Principal said she would take care of ND Bully, and I said (sin of all sins!!) okay.
But now that option seems to be cut off from my kid. If she goes to an adult for help, shit hits the fan. FUCKING PEOPLE!!!!!
Add to all that shit a fight with my husband last night that spanned three topics all at once. At least when we fight, I know there will be a resolution, progress, more understanding -- which happened today.
I reiterate: I am in a pissy, don't know whether to scream or cry, wanting to strike out at something, trying to regain control, wanting to curl up and forget about all this, type of mood.
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1 comment:
Wow, man. That really sucks. Sounds like you went through a little slice of hell. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with that bullshit... yet.
At least you and your hubby are able to talk through your arguments. Hopefully I'll meet a rational woman to partner up with. "Rational woman". Is that a oxymoron?? ;>
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