Still in VA

We are still here and working on the house. I'm not sure exactly how much longer. Today I heard there was a possibility of going home Sat. morning. Originally, we thought we would go home last Wednesday. Didn't happen.

We busted ass today. I was wiped out mentally and physically by 4pm, but worked until 6:30pm. I started f**king up at 4pm. I spilled paint, got paint in my tools, dipped my damp rag in the paint, and I could no longer remember how to do the cutting in. Dudes, that blows. I was trying so hard. If it would have been up to me, I would have quit when I stopped being productive. Alas, it was not. We had to cram a bunch in today, because of previous short work days. Not my favorite activity.

I have been able to continue developing friendships while being here though. As a matter of fact, I have a new "little brother". He's like four months younger than me, and we fight like siblings. We have all sort of become a family unit. 3 older, 3 younger... We all play our roles well. But, of course, when we are not functioning as a group, we have different roles. I have really been paying attention to all my relationships. I have really noticed how each one is unique. Now, I'm sure I knew that intellectually, but that does not mean I really understood. I've also noticed I can get along with just about anyone in any situation, regardless of personal feelings. I'm not saying I try and make nice with the toxic waste. I'm just saying I could. I'm that awesome. ("I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!")

Anchyways...

I am trying to remember everything I ever wanted to look up when I had access to high speed, but I can't remember hardly anything. Any suggestions?

Back in Virginia

We've been in Virginia since last Thursday night. It's been great! We've moved furniture, spackled, painted, pressure washed... We've been busy! We have a good crew this time too. Actually, we have almost the same crew. We took one person out and added a different one.

Here's something cool - Every single one of us (except one)is the baby of our family. The one that isn't is an only child, so, in my mind, that still counts. What are the odds of 5 out of 6 people being the baby? We all work so well together. I wonder if that's why...

Last one of the day - I swear!

You're a sensitive kisser.

You don't want to scare people away by being more or less aggressive than they're used to, so you adapt your kisses to match any situation. If you sense that the person you're kissing wants more tongue pressure or more hair-stroking, you'll eagerly comply. You appreciate when the people you kiss tell you exactly what they like, because then it's easier for you to make them happy. Your only kissing requirement? Lots of privacy.



That is sooooo true! I really do appreciate when I'm told what the other person likes. It makes it so much easier on me - less thinking.

Plus, the privacy thing was dead-on accurate. I don't want anyone aware of what I'm doing. Well, what I'm currently doing... I have plenty of stories I'm willing to share, but they are from the past. Past = Safe (most of the time). I guess I feel selfish about an experience as it happens, but later - when I have evaluated and re-evaluated the situation, got everything out of it I possibly can, and it doesn't make me look really bad - I might share it.

So.... What do you like? I can keep a secret...

Found this on Cricket's site ("dagnabbit already" in sidebar)

You are 11:59 a.m.

You are late-sleepy relaxation, the half-awake moment when you realize it's morning, but you don't have to get up, because there's no place you have to be. You are that cozy spot under the covers where everything feels temporarily perfect, even if you know you'll eventually have to wiggle out and start the day. Maybe you're the artistic type, who doesn't function well on a normal schedule. Sleep's important to you, and you like the freedom of sleeping as late as you want (especially since that is closely related to the freedom to stay up as late as you want). You like to roll out of bed, put on some comfy clothes, and get a laid back start to the day. If not everything on your list gets accomplished, no worries. Your only priority is having no priorities – you just want to take things at a slow, mellow pace.

14% of the people who took this quiz got the same evaluation.


Cricket, we are in the same 14%!! Feel free to copy/paste the rest of the info, if you want. Always knew we were a perfect match! (Don't tell J...)

Valentine's Day Card *some Mush Alert*

My husband broke the rules of Anti-Valentine's Day and brought home a card for me. He has this way of picking the perfect card. I've accused him of having an insider at Hallmark.

If any of you know our story, you'll see how perfectly this follows it:

~The card~

There I was-
one minute getting to know you,
enjoying you and wondering
where it would all lead...
and the next,
thinking about you all the time,
knowing that I never, ever
wanted to be without you!
I guess that's the way life is.
You're going along
doing your everyday things,
and out of the blue, life gives you
this wonderful present,
a present you had no idea
how much you wanted.
That's what you are
to me, you know,
a precious gift...

Falling in love with you
was something I hadn't expected,
but being in love with you
is something I couldn't stop,
even if I tried.
What I'm trying to say is -
You're "it" for me, now and forever.
Linda Lee Elrod



Isn't that great? To top it off, the very next day I was bitchy as hell (laptop problems). He comes home with another card just to cheer me up. Sometimes I forget... how great he is, how well he knows me, how lucky I am, and how much he truly loves me, unlike others that came before.

Anti-Valentine's Day

We had an Anti-Valentine's Day potluck/party last night. It was for all the people that either don't care about Valentine's Day (like us) or don't have a partner to screw up with.

It was pretty great. A couple friends made Un-valentine hearts with sayings like, "I loathe you", "Heartless Bitch", "Pure Evil", "Be my Beergoggle Valentine", and "Black Shriveled Raisin Heart". On the back were instructions of what we were supposed to do if we picked that heart. There were some crazy ones! Well, crazy for the people that drew them... We ended up pinning the hearts to our clothes, and wore them proudly - like badges of honor. I drew two extra - just to wear them.

I was also told by someone (prominant dumbass) that I was harmless. He then amended it to 'mostly harmless'. (~Who can tell me what that is from?~) What he doesn't realize is, I have been holding back the entire time he has known me. I'm sure the older generation would call this growing up. I disagree. I am just more selective with my behaviors. Plus, my daughter is ALWAYS around. I have to censor quite a bit because of that. It kinda sucks. I used to give off the vibe of being "trouble", and now I'm harmless? Fuck. I really need my life back. I've even been called a prude recently - more than once. Yeah, that's me.

The problem is, the people that could back me up, won't. Thank god. They don't need to talk about that type of stuff unless I say it's okay. And I won't say it is. I value my privacy. I suppose the only one that could say anything would be L (husband), but I like to keep that private too. No one needs to know about that shit either. Damn it.

Happy Belated Anti-Valentine's Day!!!!!!!!!

I will upload the pic of my hearts later. I still need to get it off my camera.

*SCREAM*

My laptop is fucked. I'm not sure what is wrong with it. I am probably going to have someone else work on it - for the first time ever. Even with our old desktop pc, I always fixed it. Granted, I have techie friends that helped back then. This time around, the only accessible-today techie will mess it up. I'm going to have to pay for it. Damn it. At least, the person I'm planning to pay, I trust.

I need the wireless to work before next Wednesday night. I am probably going to Virginia again to work. I really really need to bring my laptop with me. I can't be gone for almost a week without it. What would I load my pictures into? What about all the info I've been studying? I really need this fixed. Like now.

I am completely freaking out! Fuck, fuck fuck!!!!!!

Some I advice I insist you live by. I have so decreed it.

Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly.

Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably. Pray without ceasing, and never regret anything that made you smile.

Today - B.C.

I made the decision that I was not going to do anything yesterday. I accomplished what I set out to do. My house is now a mess, my hair looks like a rat's nest (which only got worse when I passed out on the couch), and I don't have a lot of time today to do anything about any of it.

We are taking my truck out to get a couple loads of future compost. I need coffee. I can't even begin to think which clothes I'll be okay wearing while shoveling shit. I know I have some...

I am looking forward to the shower after we're done. No point to doing it now.

My prominent dumbass is getting better. The sad thing is, it is only temporary. Patterns don't lie. Oh well, if this is what I have to do, I'll do it. It's either this or kill somebody. While killing someone would be immensely satisfying at the time, working on our relationship is probably the better option. But dammit!, I didn't want a second husband - never have! We have decided many times not to ever get re-married. Neither one of us want to do the work involved. It's exhausting. And yet, here I am. What lesson could I possibly learn from a repeat? How to avoid it? How to change it more efficiently? How to deal with it without feeling murderous? What the hell is the Universe trying to tell me????? Maybe it is just a test to see if I can hang on to my identity when it would be easier to just step into the background. Well, if that's it, I should be okay... maybe. I like me. I like to feel like me. I don't like to sacrifice myself just so other persons can be. That's not fair, plus it's my turn.

Wow - I should not try to post before coffee... Going to get some now, and brush my hair & teeth... Maybe straighten up if I have time. Coffee most definitely first.

Best weekend ever

We arrived home safe and sound last night. Well, safe anyway.

I have been taking this day to just chill and remember moments, no - events, of this past weekend. There are so many! I had no idea we packed in so much weirdness, and awe-inspiring oblivion, plus so much more. It got to the part of the evening when my husband and I were able to catch each other up on what had happened over our separate weekends. I thought there would be a few stories, and that was it. But, oh no - there are so many!!! I haven't even recalled all of them yet. This may take a few days...

Our crew had the "what's wrong with making everyone wait for me?" moments over and over and over... There was the "half-naked wake up call - plus public exposure" memorable image, the "foreman - in name only", and even the "I have had so little sleep, I've crossed over to insanity" event. Too funny!

We packed so much in!

One of my weekend co-workers stopped by today for coffee. He pointed out how rare it was to do what we did. Every bump in the road - and there were a ton of them- each person had the sentiment of "It's cool. Let's go on from here." Bump. "It's cool. Let's go on from here." It wasn't a previously agreed upon way to do things. We all just flowed with what was going on, and making it work. That's cool. It's a good feeling when you know you work well with someone.

I had hard core sleep dep issues by Saturday night. I only had a few hours a night (2 1/2 - 3) starting Wednesday night, but Friday night I only had 1 1/2 hours. I was sleep dep on crack. EVERYTHING was funny. It became contagious. Our crew laughed a lot over the weekend. I feel so uplifted and relaxed. I think every single one of us that was there, needed to be there for one reason or another. They don't say, "Laughter is the best medicine" for no reason. Plus, we were able to work out issues that would have been more difficult on home turf. It had a "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" kind of feel to it. It gave us more freedom.

Several relationships I previously had with people changed for the better. I think we were all open and willing to listen to our hearts. (I'm gagging as I'm writing this sappy crap. I'll get better, I promise.) I really got to know one person for the first time - even though we are neighbors and in each other's social circles. With another, I think we had a breakthrough with how we communicate, and how to improve it. It was emotionally draining, and there were tears -- but it was so worth it to feel we are on our way to understanding each other. My third and favorite change was getting time to remember and renew a friendship. It's tricky getting to know each other again, but not bad tricky. Actually, kind of fun. No - totally fun. I also proved to the group, as a whole, that I wasn't as lazy and unreliable as they all believed I was. That was cool. I knew an opportunity would present itself one day.

All of these positive changes are a lot to take in. I'm enjoying every second of it though. A job well done, friendships strenghthened, and new kick-ass neighbors. What sounds better than that?

I'm no longer a virgin!

Yes, folks, you heard me correctly. I had my cherry popped.

Would you like to hear about it?

When it began, I felt a little dizzy. Dizziness led to all-over body chills. I had this roaring in my ears - sound wave after sound wave crashed into me. I was in awe. I had never experienced anything like it before. I thought I had seen/felt something similar before, but I was wrong. There is nothing like it. I can't wait to experience it again.  I felt the massive power behind it all.  It was like being next to the Gods.


Today, for the very first time, I saw the ocean.  The Atlantic Ocean from Nags Head.  Wow oh wow oh wow.  

The dizziness was the anticipation building and opening up the senses.  Chills were from the very strong wind that was constantly blowing.  The waves crashing on the beach was the roaring I heard.

Have any of you ever been to Lake Superior?  It is one of the Great Lakes.  If you stand on the shore, you can't see the other side.  I never had a huge drive to see the ocean, cuz I figured it would look pretty much the same.  Boy, was I wrong!!!  It is nothing like Lake Superior - except for the fact that you can't see the opposite shore.





Dudes, it was so amazing.  I have shells, sand, and driftwood from today.  I know that is so cheesy, but I wanted a physical memory of this first time experience.

Now I just have to go to a strip bar and a casino.  I haven't been to either place.  I seem so sheltered when I list stuff like that.

This little mini vacation has been excellent so far.  We head to North Carolina tomorrow morning to finish loading the truck.  We made excellent time today.  Tomorrow will be easier - just lift and load.  After we get everything that we are moving, we are staying in a hotel.  Fabulous!  The mini vacation continues!  Plus, did I ever mention I'm getting paid to enjoy myself?  I am such a whore.  (And I'm okay with that.)

For astrology believers:  Ever been with two Librans trying to decide on something?  It's entertaining!  I am half of this pair.  We made all kinds of decisions that don't have any actual relevance.  We got stuck trying to decide which ring tone to use for our alarm.  I asked the other two people with us - hoping for a tie breaker.  No such luck.  We just made a bigger tie, and there was no one else to ask.  A decision did get made   ...eventually.

On our drive to the ocean and back, excellent feel-good conversations were had by all.  We did get a little silly (I blame sleep dep.), a little creative ( I believe that was the ocean), and a lot happy (I credit that to the company.).  We seemed like a very cohesive foursome.  Actually, I feel that way about our entire crew this weekend - at least those that I consider part of the crew.  If you pretend to work, or make more work for the rest of us, you don't count in my world.  My world is the only one that matters, right?

Goodnight y'all (says the chick that hails from a land-locked state).

6 ~too early~ 30 AM

My phone rang at 6:30am this morning. 6 fucking 30 A. goddamn M.

Was somebody dead?

Dying?

Maimed, bleeding or hurt in some way?

Anything on fire?

The answer to these (and all other questions you would ask at 6:30am) is no. A big resounding NO. No? What the hell???

Just another dumbass I have collected - the prominent dumbass currently - to say he was going to be late. What?!?!?!?

I wasn't even driving. What did he expect me to do? Make people wait for his unhappy ass? Yeah, I have the power. Watch me stop this train.

As if that wasn't enough, he called again an hour later. I have no idea what he wanted that time. I hung up. The only thing he was able to say was "Hello". It felt great.

We made it to Virginia perfectly fine. Only one missed turn (and we didn't end up in Texas, dollface) and two stops in 8 1/2 hours.


One last thing: Where can I get earplugs?

I'm outta here!

I am leaving the house tomorrow to go to Virginia, North Carolina, and then back here on Saturday. I'm helping friends move out here.

Did you catch that? I'm leaving the house... without the family... on my own... No one but myself to answer to...

I'm in a reasonable facsimile of heaven!!

I think this will be refreshing.


It better be.

Urban Word of the Day

disneyfication


The act of taming the world to make it all safe, clean, and completely similar to a theme park.

To remove the sharp edges and darkness that is life.

Example: NYC suffered from disneyfication under Rudy, and now is as boring as any small town, USA.

We did what????

The world must have ended. Hell froze over, or maybe pigs are flying.


We had a Super Bowl party. Let me say that again...

We had a Super Bowl party.

Granted, it was last-minute. We didn't have anything else to do. One of our friends wanted to watch it. Why not have a party? Most of the people I hang with don't watch football. It seemed like a great idea to have a party for something we couldn't give a flying rat's ass about.

I called everyone in the vicinity, and only a few people didn't show up.

I have no idea what happened during the game. I only paid attention during the commercials. Those were great!

What was up with no cheerleaders during halftime? I didn't want to see Tom Petty. I couldn't find a place to escape for the entire performance. And thanks to the DVR, I had the extreme pleasure of watching it twice. Twice. I get a headache just thinking about it.

We had the usual aspects of a Super Bowl party. We had people cheering both teams. We had snacks. We even had the "I've had too much to drink" person. Which, of course, led to the person that went after the drunk person - in the rain. What more could a football lover like me ask for?

Here's what. Because we recorded it instead of watching it live, the ending didn't get recorded. Sweet! I have no idea what the final score is, but I do know who won - the team I picked with all of my football expertise. I used a very scientific method. I like New York. The city, the state... I don't even know where the Patriots are from. Wait, was it Boston? I have no idea. The Giants are from New York, and that's all I needed to know. Team picked!

Why does it always seem like the Super Bowl teams have the same colors?
Maybe it's just me.

Well, folks, I'm tired. I am off to some relaxed state. Couch good, sleep better...

Super Bowl Sunday

Today someone mentioned the Super Bowl. My kid -my 12 year old kid- asked, "What's a super bowl?"

I was so proud.


Later, she asked how the bowling was going.

I'm doing something right.

Coming out better for it

I am proud of myself. I had a challenge with temptation last night. I really really wanted to, but I did not give in. Sucked during the moment, but today?

I feel happy and peaceful and content. All of that would have been tainted (overcome) by guilt and shame. Instead, I can focus on the good things.

I am in an amazing mood today. Yay me!

Evil women should be rewarded

A woman went to her doctor. The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, "I have some bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order."

The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting.

"Well daughter, we women celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I have cancer. Let's head to the club and have a martini." After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less somber. There were some laughs and more martinis.

They were eventually approached by some of the woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two were celebrating.

The woman told her friends they were drinking to her impending end. "I've been diagnosed with AIDS."

The friends were aghast and gave the woman their condolences. After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned over and whispered, "Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS."

The woman said, "I don't want any of those bitches sleeping with your father after I'm gone."


Yes, women, we are evil....

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